Spooks & Scares: October Horrorscopes

Predicted By: Charisma Ganye

It’s spooky season and the stars have aligned. For some this spooky season will be quite nice and not too scary. For others, however, things may get a little ~eerie~.

Aries (Mar 21- Apr 19)- Worms! Gotta love em. One day you’re going to befriend a worm who will teach you the “worm way” which then leads you to try and become a worm. While this does work out, being a worm isn’t as great as you thought it would be. 

Taurus (Apr 20- May 20)- Eels are pretty cool right? You sure think so. Explains why you just bought 68 of them. 

Gemini (May 21- Jun 20)- Eels are not your friend so definitely stay away from Taurus. 

Cancer (Jun 21- Jul 22)- Naughty boy Harry Styles will run his hands through your luscious hair then you’ll go bald and never see Harry Styles again. You do receive a lock of his hair in the mail but it’s just not the same.  

Leo (Jul 23- Aug 22)- In case of emergency you should definitely not be called. You’ll be mistaken for a doctor and boy will it be a mess. That’s one career field off the table now. 

Virgo (Aug 23- Sep 22)- EEK! Some horrific creature is gonna start following you around– they have an endless supply of snacks so no need to worry. 

Libra (Sep 23- Oct 22)- Huh?! Did you just say “goo goo gaa gaa?” Looks like someone is a little baby now!

Scorpio (Oct 23- Nov 21)- Undead stuffed animals are in your future. All the stuffed animals you own will come to “life.”  Who’s to say what they want to do with you, but they do seem to be an organized group of individuals so watch your back 

Sagittarius (Nov 22- Dec 21)- Torrential rain. Zombies. Poisoned honey. These are all elements of your award winning horror version of the Bee Movie. Bee scared, am I right? 

Capricorn (Dec 22- Jan 19)- Jeff Goldblum will haunt your dreams 😉 What a lovely man. 

Aquarius (Jan 20- Feb 18)- Risk is your middle name. You know there’s a big risk drinking out of the weird goblet that appears in your kitchen one Thursday evening. Turns out, it’s Kuzco’s poison (but not really) and you turn into a llama a la The Emperor’s New Groove. 

Pisces (Feb 19- Mar 20)- Squash will become an essential thing in your life (both the game and the food.)

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