2022 Predictions: This Celebrity Was Seen Kissing Who?!?
By: Jourdan Batson
Capricorn: Please stop telling everybody your New Years’ resolution is to memorize the family tree of everyone in all of your classes. It’s weird and between us, Reagan is in contact with her family’s lawyer.
Aquarius: Applebee’s is where you’ll meet your twin flame, go there every single day from open to close, or else it won’t happen.
Pisces: Umbrellas are not lucky for you this month. I can’t say anything else.
Aries: Lab coats are going to be the most popular 2022 fashion only in January and only for you.
Wear one and people will probably give you 40 million dollars.
Taurus: Breve lattes are not delicious. You’ll probably go to the bathroom a lot of times because of the sole amount of dairy in the drink. Stay away from it- or don’t.
Gemini: Lie this year. To everyone. Trust me. Or don’t, maybe I’m lying.
Cancer: Apple juice isn’t better than orange juice. Stop denying this true statement. Drink some orange juice this month and get the calcium I know you need. Also, drink water.
Leo: Rango is debatably a horror movie. Don’t watch it or you’ll probably have nightmares for the rest of your life.
Virgo: Tuesdays are your lucky day. And every other day of the week because you are lucky and the best sign. This is unbiased and this was actually said by every celebrity ever. You probably couldn’t find the source though because they said it to the stars who said it to me.
Libra: Lions are the animal for Leo, which you are not leo you are libra.
Scorpio: Octagon is a silly shape, but is it sillier than triangle? Once you decide, you will know the secret.
Sagittarius: Lower your standards for 2022, this is probably not your year. Good luck in 2023!