The End of The “Tweenager”: A Fight for Girlhood in Modern Media
By Reese Watson
According to the Cambridge Dictionary, Tweenager: “a young person between the ages of approximately eight and twelve.” A collective jumble of years, that for most were filled with awkward conversations, the end of elementary school, and balancing on a constant tightrope of still receiving a kids menu while switching from Disney Channel to the CW.
To me, my tween years were what I believed everybody was experiencing at the time. To paint you a picture of my tweenhood from 2012-2016, my favorite outfit consisted of a bright pink, Southern Comfort, sherpa sweatshirt, capri leggings, and thigh high Ugg boots (and yes, they did have bows running down the sides)--but you also couldn’t forget the pièce de résistance, an old, white, Lululemon headband, which indeed was worn with a slick-back top knot. No, I did not have a skincare routine, and upon talking to my friends they claim that their skincare consisted of “Clean and Clear: Morning Burst.” My memories at times of these years can be a little fuzzy. It feels as if my life had a momentary pause in childhood and didn’t start functioning again until I was a teenager. So, this begs the question: is that time worth discussing in the first place?
Today’s Tweens:
If you have social media you probably already know what I’m about to mention. The thing that has garnered so much attention from all age groups: today's tween.
Tweens today are saying goodbye to Barbies, and are even cutting out all toys on their Christmas lists. There is no longer a demand for cheap makeup and candy-flavored lip balms, and a Kindle Fire or an Xbox 360 is no longer on the forefront of tweens' heads when they think of luxury technology. Instead, now kids wish for hundred dollar skin care sets and iPhone 15’s, which then--eventually--turns into feeding the “Apple Ecosystem.”
In fact, while most social media platforms today require users to be at least thirteen years old, almost 40% of eight to twelve year olds use social media regularly.
And speaking of hundred dollar skincare products, after several viral videos posted around social media showing of an increase of young girls in local makeup stores, tweens have now garnered the term, “Sephora Tweens” from adults who feel as if this recent influx of young shoppers is ruining their shopping experience, and buying out some of their favorite brands--for example, the most popular brand talked about online for this age group, Drunk Elephant.
And to put this trend into perspective, since the beginning of 2023 spending on skincare products among tweens has gone up 20%, with even some doctors warning that this could do more harm than good. In fact, dermatologists argue for tweens to keep it simple, like gentle cleanser, moisturizer, and sunscreen--anything more serious could damage or dry out the skin, for example if tweens are using products with retinol.
And these products are not cheap. When still using the example of Drunk Elephant on the Sephora website, and sorting by their best selling products, the “Intensive Hydration Serum with Hyaluronic Acid” is $49.00. The “Polypeptide Firming Refillable Moisturizer” ranges from $22.00 to $98.00 depending on the size you choose. And get this, their simple “Lippe Balm” is $18.00.
A picture displaying Drunk Elephant skincare off of the Sephora website
Now for the clothing. Usually what you see tween’s wear, it’s exactly what teen’s wear. Lululemon is still all the rage, which does include the ultra popular crossbody bag. In fact, almost every video I found including “Sephora Tweens” showcased a young girl--usually with her friends--crossbody bag in hand, wearing some type of trendy athletic leisure. Now, my table mate Isabella pointed out something really interesting about this choice, what do they even carry in those bags? They don’t have keys, they don’t have cards or a license, maybe they have cash, but why? Almost every bag I see on these little girl’s bodies are saggy, thin, and limp.
Uggs are still popular, but instead of boots they’re now slip ons, with a platform bottom. Maybe that’s just because they’re popular among teens and adults, but as another table mate of mine Elle said, “maybe it’s for them to appear taller.”
From when I was a tween to now, trendy clothing has severely increased in price. For example, my favorite store was Justice, a brand that was known for its bright colors, obnoxious patterns, and an alarming usage of sequences and sparkles. On its website the average t-shirt costs about $25 to $30. Now on the flip side, one of the most popular Lululemon t-shirts, the “Swiftly Tech Short-Sleeve Shirt 2.0” is exactly $68.00.
A comparison of shirt prices and styles, straight off of both the Justice and Lululemon websites.
One thing is for sure, the average expense of tween products and clothing has gone up because they no longer buy things marketed for kids/tween’s, they are buying teen/adult products. But this begs the question: are there really any tween products left?
From what I could find online, only a couple of brands specifically had the word “tween” advertised as a section, or a style of clothing. Target, Gap, and Justice being the top answers, followed by a couple more “fancy” brands like Nordstrom and Janie and Jack. However, most of these clothing brands had this section blended into their already existing children's section.
Social media’s advertising isn’t much better. On TikTok--the new hub for children to “hang out”--when I searched the words “tween clothing,” several weird or concerning videos popped up. These videos (which I’ll show below) featured tween girls usually dancing in what I considered to be pretty scandalous tween clothing, if it was even tween clothing at all. I don’t remember tweens wearing crop tops and daisy dukes. This is the new normal from what I could find, little to no bright patterns, or outlandish sparkle--young girls were impersonating teenagers for views and advertisement. And speaking of advertising, when you realize that an adult was styling the outfits, or encouraging the girls to dance, it makes the whole situation feel even worse.
A TikTok promoting a clothing store, using #TweenClothing. https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8GgFSGp/
A business using #TweenClothing to style-what they think as-'tween outfits'. https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8GgRfTf/
Another example of business using the #TweenClothing to promote their store. https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8GbKUDk/
A recently posted TikTok of two young girls describing themselves as "Gen Alpha Influencers" (and yes, their mom is filming them). https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8Gg81h1/
Speaking of adults, this leads into my next topic of discussion.
Who’s to Blame:
Now to preface this, I am not a parent, I do not have kids. But I am a newly turned eighteen year old girl, I’ve recently experienced tweenhood for myself, I know their desires--I know that all they want to do is hurry up and be a teen.
Since we know that a vast majority of tweens are on, or have access to, social media we can begin to understand their urges to grow up if all they see are grown ups. And not just regular grown ups, famous grown ups, beautiful women, rich women, old women, young women--the internet is endless. That’s what makes it so dangerous.
However, these things and feelings aren’t new. Society has always projected female fantasies onto the public, and the sexualization of young women is nothing new. Some examples that particularly jump out at me are shows like “Toddlers In Tiaras” that show girls as young as six months old competing in pageants wearing full faces of makeup, wigs, short-cupcake style dresses, and fake teeth known as flippers.
A collage showing off different photos and headshots from the show "Toddlers and Tiaras."
Another one that stands out to me is the 1955 book, Lolita by Valdimir Nabokov, which I read in its entirety when I was only sixteen years old. To give you a little rundown of what this book is, it follows a pedophile--only attracted to what he refers to as “nymphets”--named Humbert Humbert, as he falls obsessively in love with a twelve year old girl named Lolita. Now if you’re like me, after reading this book you were given a look into a disgusting story with stylistic flair, featuring some intense social commentary on men's minds, society, and the sexualization of young women. However, if you were Vanity Fair you would say it was, “The only convincing love story of our century.” And if you were Hollywood you would give it not one, but two screen adaptations. And if you were on social media, you would then create video edits further normalizing sexualizing this supposed twelve-year-old girl, crafted perfectly with stolen frame shots and music featuring Lana Del Rey. After its release, the name Lolita would become so significant that it would be added to the dictionary in 1959 as, “a precociously seductive girl.” And the internet now uses the term “The Lolita Effect'' to describe this romanticization of the sexualization of minors, but specifically tweens.
So, how does this affect us today? Well you could make the claim that social media and modern day technology is a hive for encouraging “speed aging” and is also promoting tweens’ habits and styles.
To put something else into perspective for you, over 70% of Generation Alpha’s parents are Millenials. Social media and the internet itself are still relatively new, and even though Generation Z is the only generation to have had the internet available to them their entire lives, Millennials aren’t strangers to it either. So, now we live in a world where 90% of Millennials use social media regularly, and rarely unrestricted, and some of that generation could now be raising the next with possibly unfiltered, normalized media intake.
So, to come to a conclusion, do we blame society for this cycle, the parents monitoring their children on social media, or the girls themselves?
Final Thoughts:
Growing up is a natural cycle, it's inevitable, and in the moment you don’t realize it’s happening until you blink and you’re already grown.
The “Tweenager stage” is one of the most important cycles in growing up; it allows us a stepping stone between being a child to being a teen. We learn about ourselves in this time, we become more intelligent in this time, and we view opportunities in a new light in this time.
To me, we need to monitor young girls' online activities, we need to fight for tween-centered media, clothing, makeup, and even affordable skincare. Parents need to step up to protect these girls. Teenagers and adults online can begin to help and promote positive tween content. And as a society we should also be willing to call out the sexualization of young girls, and decrease corporate companies benefiting from these children.
It’s okay to be young. It’s okay to play with Barbies when you're twelve, and get excited over cheap-sparkly makeup. I see girls all the time chasing those feelings, like you now have women in their twenties wearing bows, loving the color pink, collecting stuffed animals. One thought about this that sticks out to me comes from the song “First Love/Last Spring” by an artist named Mitski. In the song she sings the line, “And I was so young when I behaved twenty-five. Yet now, I find I’ve grown into a tall child.” For most that feeling is all too real.
This article isn’t just about nostalgia and candy-flavored lip gloss. It’s a wake up call for people. It’s a cry for help, it’s a cry to save girlhood.
